In October 2012, President Thomas S. Monson announced the missionary age change. Young women could now serve beginning at age 19 if they chose to do so.
I know many girls my age heard these words and knew that a mission was supposed to be the next step in their life.
I literally felt nothing. Nothing. I felt absolutely no different than I had felt ten minutes previous. I did realize that this would mean a lot of change in that many of my friends would be leaving much earlier than they had previously anticipated, but aside from that, I felt no affect on my personal life.
In the next few months I thought about a mission... and then laughed. Surely a mission wasn't for me. I couldn't see myself as a missionary, and it wasn't in my plan. Maybe after college if the time was right, but there was no way I was taking a break from school to serve. That would be ridiculous.
Fast-forward about a year and a half to March of 2014. At this point in my life, I had almost completed a year and a half of college at Brigham Young University in Provo, UT, I had a part-time job on-campus which I love... I was in a good place. After some thought and contemplation, I decided that a mission might be good for me--in a year! In this year, I could apply to the Business Management major at BYU and have enough time to prepare mentally and spiritually.
March 31, 2014. I was emailing a friend of mine who is currently serving a mission in Mexico, and I told him the news that I had been considering serving a mission in a year!! I was so excited with this news. His response left me dumbfounded: "A YEAR?!? That's soooo long from now! You should put in your papers like tomorrow!"
I laughed.
But then I sat there, and it hit me--what if I did. What if I did put in my papers now.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that it didn't feel wrong. The Spirit was testifying to me so strongly that this gospel is true, I felt as if my heart was going to burst out of my chest. According to my journal I "felt this burning desire to share the gospel with the entire world. I've only felt that a couple times in my life."
I met with my YSA Bishop exactly three days later (it was the earliest appointment I could get). That Saturday (4/5/2014) I received access to my mission papers. I completed all of the requirements, then met with my Stake President from home on April 27. And my call was assigned that week, to be expected May 7-8.
May I just say...knowing that where you're going to be spending a year and a half of your life is on a paper somewhere in the mail system and not being able to see it is NERVE-WRACKING? So not a fair feeling.
It did not arrive on Wednesday May 7th, to my dismay. I went home and cried for a few minutes, I believe. But there was a tiny, tiny chance it could arrive on Thursday. I told my parents to just send me a picture of the envelope if it arrived on Thursday.
I received this at work on Thursday:
I thought very seriously about getting on the train that hour to rush home and open it... but Dad helped me decide that I could wait another day. In this day, I decided I would open it with my parents, siblings and grandparents at my home.
I think I hardly slept Thursday night.
Friday morning, I got out of bed and decided:
I was going to open my mission call by myself.
This was a very personal decision for me... long story short, I figured that as the decision to serve a mission was between me and the Lord, I wanted two people with me at my mission call opening: myself and the Lord.
As soon as I got home, I grabbed the envelope, Mom's keys and my journal.
I drove up to Holbrook Canyon, a beautiful canyon that overlooks the Bountiful temple in my hometown, Bountiful, UT.
There is a bench at the top looking directly over the temple. I sat there with my call in my hands for maybe twelve minutes, just looking at it. My hands were shaking.
I remember that I kept stalling... I opened my Book of Mormon and tried to read some verses but I couldn't focus. I finally took my cheap plastic pen and ripped open the top. Pulled the call out without looking, flipped it behind the envelope so I could see one line at a time, and decided to get it over with.
My voice shaking, I read aloud:
Dear Sister Hill,
You are hereby called to serve as a missionary of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
You are assigned to labor in the Brazil BrasÃlia Mission. It is anticipated that you will serve for a period of 18 months.
You should report to the Brazil Missionary Training Center on Wednesday, September 10, 2014. You will prepare to preach the gospel in the Portuguese language.
Let's just say, I haven't cried that hard in a really, really long time.
Tears were happiness, pure joy. Gratitude that Heavenly Father trusts me enough to call me to this great work.
After I spent some time on that peak by myself with the Lord, I hiked back down and drove home to read it aloud to my parents. I then drove to my grandma's house and read it to her, as she's been my biggest cheerleader my entire life.
Never in my entire life did I think I would have a mission call in my hands. Trust me, this was as much a surprise to me as it was to many of you.
I know that many people were unhappy that I did not make it a very public announcement that I was submitting my papers and deciding to serve, but I hope these people can understand that this was a very personal decision for me and I had to really make sure that this is what I want in my life.
And I know it is indeed what I want.
I wrote my acceptance letter to the brethren about a week after I opened my call:
It did not arrive on Wednesday May 7th, to my dismay. I went home and cried for a few minutes, I believe. But there was a tiny, tiny chance it could arrive on Thursday. I told my parents to just send me a picture of the envelope if it arrived on Thursday.
I received this at work on Thursday:
I thought very seriously about getting on the train that hour to rush home and open it... but Dad helped me decide that I could wait another day. In this day, I decided I would open it with my parents, siblings and grandparents at my home.
I think I hardly slept Thursday night.
Friday morning, I got out of bed and decided:
I was going to open my mission call by myself.
This was a very personal decision for me... long story short, I figured that as the decision to serve a mission was between me and the Lord, I wanted two people with me at my mission call opening: myself and the Lord.
As soon as I got home, I grabbed the envelope, Mom's keys and my journal.
I drove up to Holbrook Canyon, a beautiful canyon that overlooks the Bountiful temple in my hometown, Bountiful, UT.
There is a bench at the top looking directly over the temple. I sat there with my call in my hands for maybe twelve minutes, just looking at it. My hands were shaking.
I remember that I kept stalling... I opened my Book of Mormon and tried to read some verses but I couldn't focus. I finally took my cheap plastic pen and ripped open the top. Pulled the call out without looking, flipped it behind the envelope so I could see one line at a time, and decided to get it over with.
My voice shaking, I read aloud:
Dear Sister Hill,
You are hereby called to serve as a missionary of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
You are assigned to labor in the Brazil BrasÃlia Mission. It is anticipated that you will serve for a period of 18 months.
You should report to the Brazil Missionary Training Center on Wednesday, September 10, 2014. You will prepare to preach the gospel in the Portuguese language.
Let's just say, I haven't cried that hard in a really, really long time.Tears were happiness, pure joy. Gratitude that Heavenly Father trusts me enough to call me to this great work.
After I spent some time on that peak by myself with the Lord, I hiked back down and drove home to read it aloud to my parents. I then drove to my grandma's house and read it to her, as she's been my biggest cheerleader my entire life.
Never in my entire life did I think I would have a mission call in my hands. Trust me, this was as much a surprise to me as it was to many of you.
I know that many people were unhappy that I did not make it a very public announcement that I was submitting my papers and deciding to serve, but I hope these people can understand that this was a very personal decision for me and I had to really make sure that this is what I want in my life.
And I know it is indeed what I want.
I wrote my acceptance letter to the brethren about a week after I opened my call:
I will close with my simple but pure testimony.
I know that the gospel of
Jesus Christ is real and it is true. I know that Jesus Christ suffered in the
Garden so that you, me and the entire world could repent and return to God
someday. I know that the Lord has given us guidelines and commandments to make
us happy, not to make us sad or frustrated. I know that the Lord has a purpose
in everything, even if we cannot see it with our natural eyes. I know that the
Book of Mormon is correct and full of truth and light; if we read it, we can
gain an understanding of the eternities.
I know that with the
Lord, anything and everything is possible.
I can't wait to bring my brothers in sisters in Brazil to a knowledge of their Savior and Redeemer.
